What Does Conscious Uncoupling Mean?

By: Kelly Collis

Gwyneth Paltrow announced on Tuesday, March 25 she is “conscious[ly] uncoupling” from her husband of 10 years, Chris Martin. In a post on her site Goop, known for dissecting fashion and recipe trends, she posted her statement and new-age bull. Where do I start?

The word divorce was not used once. What is so wrong with that word? Apparently, she get this from her new age and lifestyle guru Dr. Habib Sadeghi. He runs an integrative health center based in LA.  He says conscious uncoupling means that the couple examines their life inward and ultimately, it is not the couple that is a problem. Rather “there are no bad guys, just two people, each playing teacher and student.” It gets more bizarre – her new age guidance counselor’s wife is also her children’s dentist.  The same dentist that believes many childhood disorders like ADHD stem from proper dental hygiene.

As a divorced parent who has battled the stigma of divorce with my friends and family, and have worked hard to co-parent with my unruly ex, we need to embrace families that are trying hard to move forward. Using the words “conscious uncoupling” is a huge step back from divorce and the family law that has evolved significantly in the last few decades to provide a supportive environment for the children that have separated or divorced parents.

I have loathed Gwyneth and her preachy web site Goop for years. In fact, a year ago the Washington Post did an article correcting her post about the places to visit in Washington, D.C. Claiming she never uses a ghost writer, there were several factual errors, proving that she had not been to D.C.

I respect any couple that is going through a separation and divorce especially when children are involved. My beef with Gwen is that she is so self-righteous and her statement somehow makes what she and Chris are doing seem like the correct path and for those that have a gone through divorce have somehow failed in their journey.

– Kelly Collis

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